


i just wrote like 20 tracks with that bih

by jbbames (artifice)



Series: put me in the dirt, let me be with the stars [7]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Music, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Mario Kart, Non-Serum Steve Rogers/Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes | Shrinkyclinks, Rock Star Bucky, SoundCloud shenanigans, howling commandos have a discord server, songwriter Steve, steve vlogs, they're such DORKS ugh i can't
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-27
Updated: 2019-07-27
Packaged: 2020-07-20 16:20:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19995145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artifice/pseuds/jbbames
Summary: “Hey bitches,” Sam stretches out lazily in his chair, the camera shaking as he adjusts the angle. “Steve’s dead. I killed him.”Offscreen, Steve lets out an amused snort of laughter.





	i just wrote like 20 tracks with that bih

**Author's Note:**

> ... happiness..?
> 
> [series playlist here!](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6dD3nFHjQtq0HVoRPxbYFs?si=U-IHMVdEQcKP1q5e6kCWoQ)

**_Your love is scaring me_ **  
**_No one has ever cared for me_ **  
**_As much as you do_ **

* * *

_July 28, 2018_

“Hey bitches,” Sam stretches out lazily in his chair, the camera shaking as he adjusts the angle. “Steve’s dead. I killed him.”

Offscreen, Steve lets out an amused snort of laughter.

“Shut up, Steve, you’re dead.”— Sam winks at the camera— “This is my vlog now. I’m taking over the vlog and the company.”

Steve lets out a groan from across the table. “Oh my God, Sam.”

Sam opens his mouth to speak, but the familiar, terrifying sounds of Natasha Romanoff entering Steve’s apartment (the click of her heels against the hardwood) cut him off promptly.

“We’re in the dining room, babe,” he calls out instead, and the camera turns to capture a perfectly coiffed Natasha leaning against the threshold.

“That Steve’s little vlog?” she asks, admiring herself in the small screen. “Mm. She don’t look so bad.”

Even with just the top half of his head in frame, Steve lets out a squawk of protest and ducks. The camera follows.

“Not _fair_ ,” he whines. “My face looks ridiculous, do _not_ point that thing at me for at _least_ the next 10 minutes.”

And indeed, Steve looks rather silly: he has a clay face mask on the bottom half of his face, and it looks not unlike a patchy, green… paste beard. Sam’s prompt laughter shakes the screen and blurs the footage, and the vlog cuts out.

-

Kim sends stickers, perfume, and a basket of cherries. Bucky, after determining that the cherries taste _fuckin’ awful_ , hands the whole thing to Steve to deal with. Immediately, the blond leaps for the stickers (because he’s a kid like that, okay?) and examines them carefully.

“Guess we’re throwing out the cherries,” Bucky says absentmindedly, walking into the living room and crouching to turn on the Wii U. It may be 10 in the morning, but the Commandos wait for no one when it comes to Mario Kart. He settles onto the couch, freestyling under his breath to the menu music.

“Hey lovelies, it’s Steve! Again,” he hears the sounds of his boyfriend vlogging a few metres away, and subtly, he raises the volume on the TV. “Buck’s with his, uh, side-bitch right now, and I’m composing. Sam and Nat are here”—(and in the vlog, Sam briefly turns the camera back to his face with another salacious wink)— “we’re gonna get brunch, run a few errands, and like, enjoy the sunshine.”

“Just admit you’re pushing 90 and go,” Bucky shakes the WiiU vigorously on his jump, watching with no small glee as Toad does a flip with their bike.

Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Steve flip him off lazily. “I’m a year younger than you, pal,”

“So I’m a nonagenarian, what are you gonna d—wha— MONTY! That was my cube, you shit.”

Over the Discord call, Monty laughs maniacally, and Bucky spends the rest of that particular race grumbling about _fairness_ and _why do I always get picked on, huh_ , and other incomprehensible musings.

-

“We got Kimoji stickers!” Steve exclaims, showing off the opened packet of plastic to the camera.

Sam shakes the camera side to side as if to say, ‘hell _no_ ’. “They look kind of ratchet, dude.”

“Only because you’re old and don’t like to have fun,” the blond scolds, and tears the packaging further to get the stickers out. “Oh, Bucky might like this.”

It’s just before a rematch, but Bucky figures he can stop. He says a quick goodbye (“give Steve a kiss from me!” DumDum calls out before the audio cuts), then hits the home button on the WiiU and sneaks up behind his boyfriend with a conspicuous wink to the camera. Sam, to his credit, doesn’t move an inch.

“Yeah, Kim, we threw out the cherries you sent us,” he says, plopping down beside Steve. “They tasted like shit.”

Flushing, Steve frantically waves his arms around. “Oh, my God, no. We loved the basket, thank you so much Kim, you nailed the perfume.”

“Yeah, Kim,” Bucky repeats, this time with a shit-eating grin, and brings the—literal—butt of the perfume bottle to his nose to sniff loudly. “Absolutely nailed it.”

“ _Bucky_!”

-

After another few minutes of fucking around with Steve’s vlog, Bucky ends up taking the ' **SAVAGE!'** sticker and putting it on his forehead. “Thanks, Kim,” he says, blowing a kiss at the camera. Then, actually kissing his boyfriend, “see you later, babe. Love you,”

“Love you too,” Steve smiles his thousand-watt smile, and they spend a few seconds gazing adoringly at each other before Bucky reluctantly grabs his keys, steals another kiss, and heads to the studio.

-

On Bucky’s SoundCloud, _20 Tracks_ drops, and Bucky’s really pressing the line, huh, because there’s only so much Steve can take before he demands an entire day spent in bed, _honestly_.

(“Twenty thousand? Really?”

“Baby, you deserve my whole fucking bank account.”

“While I appreciate the sentiment, may I remind you that we’ve had a joint account since we were teens—”

“Jesus, okay, I’ll up the value,”

“Bucky, no, they’ll think I’m a spoiled gold digger, or something,”

“C2H4 what I rockin’, 25k just for walkin’,”

“ _Bucky_.”

“Spent 50k on my man, Tiffany up on my hands,”

“I swear to _God_.”)

**Author's Note:**

> fuck it i love it hey bucky run up the budget ! *static sounds* u can talk to me on [twitter!](https://twitter.com/artificiaIis)
> 
> on god this whole series is trash lmaoooooo


End file.
